Thursday, April 19, 2007

St. Anger

I'm still not sure that I actually picked the right career. I'm a prosecutor now, and it's absolutely true that I enjoy this job more than anything else in the practice of law. I can safely say that I will never go back to private practice again.

However, I still have to deal with liars and the bigger liars that represent them.

Attorneys are, as a breed; scumbags. There are individuals that are ok. But as a whole, this is a reprehensible profession, filled with reprehensible people who think they have to win at all costs. Even if that means telling a flat-out lie to get an acquittal for a client, or screwing over somebody to win.

I don't like this. I don't operate that way, and I get really resentful when it happens to me. Even though I shouldn't. I know what this breed is like, and I make the mistake time after time of letting down my guard. I constantly get fooled into believing they are not all like that. And I'm proven wrong more often than not.

Here's where the hard part of being a follower of Christ comes in. I have to let this sort of thing go, or it will tear me up forever more. It's not in the least bothering the person that did it.

This is where the limits of human flesh come into play. I can't do it. I've got to turn it over to God. And it's hard to turn loose of this anger and resentment. But I have to. I've got to turn the other cheek. And the only way to do that is pass it off to somebody whose kindness, mercy, wisdom, and power far exceed mine. Personally, I'd like to drag this lawyer over carpet tacks and dip him in rubbing alcohol.

So it's in the Almighty's hands at this point. Mine would strangle.

Tomorrow's another day, though. One of my favorite literary characters has two red arrows tattooed on each deltoid, pointing forward. His point in doing that was to remind himself to keep pressing forward, and never look back. That's what has to happen here, as well.

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