One day, food will start tasting better again.
One day, I’ll not have a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, knowing that I’m going to have to go home at the end of the day to a person who doesn’t seem to really like me, nor respect me.
One day, I’ll be able to sleep a night through, without waking up with my heart racing, my mind going over the million worst-case scenarios that leap out of the shadows of my subconscious when I try and rest.
One day, I’ll quit thinking about all the missed opportunities, the years lost, and the mistakes I’ve made.
One day I’ll not shut my office door to keep my coworkers from seeing my red eyes.
One day I’ll lose the feeling that I’m a dismal failure at my career and family life.
Sometimes hope is all we’ve got.
3 comments:
I hope your "one day" comes much sooner than you think.
Kyle, you need to give up the illusion that you can *make* someone love you. Take full responsibility for your own feelings and actions, but you've got to divest yourself of the responsibility for hers. Playing "what if?" is a devil's game.
Things WILL get better. Unless you worry yourself into an early grave, you aren't even middle aged yet! You still have decades of happiness ahead of you.
as steel tried in the fire, my friend.
-fellow sufferer
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